“…well, then that would be even better.”

Life is not a dream. It’s really not. I know this because right now I’m drinking an awesome beer surrounded by my dogs. This is real. So are we. And so are the ideas that keep us going.

Leonard Nimoy knew this. Better than most I suspect. It bled through his art. And if Nimoy was anything, an artist in the old sense he was. He wrote books and poetry, he took photographs, he mastered the craft of the motion picture.

It is this reason, not just because people love Spock, that made him a household name. He had the power to tell us who we are. He made it seem like he wasn’t one of us, when he was actually among the best of us.

More than anybody else, Nimoy made Star Trek. Everybody thinks it was Priceline Senόr Bancό de Rόbber Bill Shatner. It wasn’t. In the beginning, nobody working on the show really liked Shatner or Gene Roddenberry. Although folks don’t talk about it openly, except perhaps George Takei, you get the idea that things tended to almost fall apart because Shatner and Roddenberry were arrogant jerks.

Later, Nimoy and Shatner would actually build respect and ultimately a deep friendship. When you read about how Nimoy tried to help Shatner with the troubles and ultimate tragic death of his wife, it brings tears to your eyes. It’s rather strange but poetic, that two men who were friends only on screen for so many decades would actually find friendship later in life when they needed each other the most.

Don’t get me wrong, Bill cleaned up his act and I really like the guy. A lot of people still call him a bad actor. Mostly those who have never watched all of Star Trek or one episode of The Practice. But it’s clear to me, that without Nimoy, Star Trek would have been an unknown bad hack science fiction nothing.

I have the idea that Nimoy kept everybody together. Everybody else on set showed up because Nimoy was there. And the idea that was Star Trek, it was his as much as Roddenberry’s. Nimoy’s view of what Star Trek was is best exemplified by his goal with The Voyage Home where he said:

“…no dying, no fighting, no shooting, no photon torpedoes, no phaser blasts, no stereotypical bad guy. I wanted people to really have a great time watching this film and if somewhere in the mix we lobbed a couple of big ideas at them, well, then that would be even better.”

This was Star Trek. A fun show the whole family could watch, but also riddled with big ideas that could melt the brain of any serious adult. When I was a young idiot, I couldn’t stand The Voyage Home. I’d be like, “what’s with these stupid whales, man, when is somebody going to get cut in half.” But when I rewatched it last year, I couldn’t believe what a joy it was. It’s a masterpiece. I breathed in the happiness.

In a modern storytelling age where the fog of doom is pervasive, it’s comforting to go back and watch a view of the future not owned by failure and bleached skeletons. Nimoy’s future of a still flawed but noble humanity with a bright existence remains inspiring, and a future worth fighting for.

So here’s to Nimoy and the hopes that he’s embarked aloft alongside DeForest Kelley and James Doohan and they’re off to Valhalla at whatever warp factor they prefer. Kelley’s chuckling, Doohan’s got a glass of scotch, and Nimoy comments offhand as they blast into the stars, “Life is but a dream.”

leonard_nimoy

farewell shipmate, fair winds

we are our own worst enemy

These media guys are really disconnected from reality. We now know who the Jihad John guy is? Why is this front page news? I didn’t even know the news folks had named a/the guy Jihad John. Who came up with this name anyways? It’s like a five year old on acid made it up.

So the guy’s named Mohammed Emwazi and he’s a “British citizen from Kuwait”. First off, who cares? Second, either he’s a British citizen or he’s from Kuwait. I don’t think he’s both. Also, once a British citizen decides to volunteer for an organization that favors apocalyptic lunacy, I think that means he’s no longer a British citizen. On the other hand, Britain’s become so unhinged recently you can get arrested by the goon authorities for quoting Churchill or reading Charlie Hebdo. So I guess it’s not a big deal in comparison when you can apparently drink Spitfire at the pub in the morning, and be stealing human life by the afternoon.

Attention media losers! Yesterday, the self-proclaimed Islamic State for the Apocalypse, Fantasy-Porn, Death, and Effective Car Washes (ISAFPDECW) probably kidnapped and murdered say about 63 people worldwide. But this was not front page news. But Jihad John is front page news. Nothing about that makes sense.

If you want to understand why ISAFPDECW still exists, simply admire the stupidity of today’s front pages. There is no war against ISAFPDECW. You can’t be at war when you don’t even comprehend the evil that exists. ISAFPDECW murders. But the West publishes news headlines that make Mohammed Emwazi a member of the celebrity-fetish-personality crowd. One side is serious. The other is not. Or maybe it’s even worse. There is only one side. Because the other side basically has failed to show up.

jihad-john

the media needs this guy as famous as J Lo so they can sell ads

Beijing – Forbidden City; a prison fit for an emperor

It’s good to be the king, right? But what if it’s not? Like, what if you just want out? Can you leave? Can you resign? Or if you try and quit, does your successor(s) have you beheaded and your bones burned? And if that be the case, do you just rule on in misery trapped inside your own opulence and false power?

In the end, I think it’s rather easy to see why so many emperors (across many different cultures) became focused only on booze, women, the pipe, or any other kind of worldly distraction. It helped them to forget they were essentially in prison their whole darn lives.

Palace of Heavenly Purity

Palace of Heavenly Purity

I think I’d have hated to live in the Forbidden City. I think if I’d have been emperor, that I’d have schemed to have the whole place burned down. But then the eunuchs would have had me assassinated.

All throughout our planet’s rich-sick history of dictatorial monarchies, you see this problem. Brothers and sisters lay waste to each other to grab power. Servants poison their bosses. Castle intrigue, lunacy, dead bodies, etc, etc, etc.

The Forbidden City puts these traits into overdrive because it’s just so damn big and probably had an operation and culture all its own. An aura completely removed from the Chinese Empire itself. As in:

Eunuch:

“Welcome new emperor. This is your home now. But we run the place. Please obey our rules. Or we’ll get rid of you and find someone else. Any questions?”

Some corollaries from the West might be the Pretorian Guard or Versailles. Except that I think The Forbidden City is Versailles and the Pretorian Guard all rolled into one. Gee, doesn’t that sound fun! If you pitched your tent next to an active volcano, that’d be a safer place to live.

Just take a gander at this joyful list of peace and harmony (pun intended):

poor bastard – cause of bleached skeleton; age of skeleton upon commencement of bleaching

Yongle Emperor – deep depression & illness; aged 64

Hongxi Emperor – heart attack (after trying to move out of The Forbidden City, hmm…); aged 46

Xuande Emperor – illness; aged 35

Zhengtong Emperor – suicide; aged 36

Jingtai Emperor – murdered by eunuchs; aged 28

Chenghua Emperor – who the fuck knows; aged 39

Need I go on?

Yes!

Hongzhi Emperor – who the fuck knows; aged 34

Zhengde Emperor – drunk boating accident; aged 29

Jiajing Emperor – mercury overdose; aged 59

Finally! Finally, here’s a dude who made it past 40. Ah, a trend we hope, right? Am I right folks?! [shifty eyes]

Longqing Emperor – who the fuck knows; aged 39

Fuck!

And after that there’s the Wanli Emperor; whose corpse we’ve already covered in a prior post. And on and on and on.

Acquiring the position of ‘Starving Lion Hand Feeder’ would have been a safer ride. Oh man, I think The Forbidden City’s got to be like the planet’s greatest haunted castle. You can’t take twelve steps without a dead emperor’s ghost hitting you up for a beer.

Well, at least it’s pretty to look at. I guess?

Imperial Garden

Imperial Garden – this was actually very pretty

Gate of Heavenly Peace

Gate of Heavenly Peace – still adorned (for whatever reason) by a portrait of history’s greatest serial killer

Hall of the People

Hall of the People in Tiananmen Square – although not actually a hall for the people

Absurdity of the Week! Death threats!

Why has threatening to viciously eliminate your fellow human’s existence become so common?!

 

Apparently, you can’t write anything online anymore without somebody breaking out the maximum-eternal-insult.

Do you like Chris Kyle? Death threat.

Do you hate Chris Kyle? Death threat.

Are you ambiguous on Chris Kyle? Death threat.

Do you like cheese? Death threat.

Do you hate cute kitties? Death threat.

Are you ambiguous on the teachings of Musashi? Death threat.

Well, if you ask my Guests (and I sure did!) this is wholly inefficient. Why should we limit this newfound malicious behavior just to the electronic environment? Let’s branch out. Spread the love! Using my Guests’ brutal methods.

Accordingly, we offer the following example scenarios for how you must now conduct yourself face-to-face. Thank you for your cooperation. We truly desire to keep liquidation to an absolute minimum.

 

They Say: We can’t give you that day off.

You Say: I’ll slice your throat open.

 

They Say: I loved Fifty Shades of Grey.

You Say: I’m going to strangle you with a discarded rolled-newspaper.

 

They Say: I’m sorry but that transaction does not appear in our records.

You Say: I look forward to watching your wife and children cry at your funeral.

 

They Say: I stopped you for speeding.

You Say: You’ll make a beautiful bleached skeleton.

 

They Say: Your kid’s a genius.

You Say: I wonder if anybody will miss you when you die by my hand.

 

They Say: I forgot to get that report done.

You Say: Have you briefly considered the prospect of holding your own detached liver.

 

They Say: We’re sorry but that item is out of stock.

You Say: It’s likely you’ll burn very quickly given how much kerosene I plan on using.

 

Why not?! Everybody keeps saying social media encourages people to do/say things in the virtual world that they’d never do/say in the physical world. Let’s put that theory to the test!

bloody candlestick

It’s either all okay, or none of it is

I’ve been rather disturbed at the number of professional publications and folks on this blog site who have stated something along the lines of “I am not Charlie”. Their general idea is that they do not support the violence but state they don’t support offensive behavior and so choose not to republish Charlie Hebdo images.

Freedom of speech is an all in proposition. It’s either all okay, or none of it is. The New York Times or people on this blog site may not desire to offend or believe that Charlie Hebdo is in bad taste, but I suspect they have no desire to live in a world where ultimately anything they publish can be called into question over whether it’s offensive or not.

The New York Times will not publish a cartoon of Mohammed because it’s considered offensive. Does that mean they also won’t publish a picture of a gay man because some people find that offensive? What about a picture of former President Bush or President Obama? Lots of people find that offensive or in poor taste. Whatever you write you’ll eventually get to a situation where what you put on paper is offensive to somebody.

So when you draw a red line and say “I’m not going to publish this because I find it offensive” you are accepting the premise that there are limits on free speech. And then “free speech” is replaced by “proper speech”.

When you accept that speech must have limits, there’s no limit to how much folks can limit speech. Governments, corporations, religion, cultural bullies, etc are all interested in limiting free speech because it suits their interests. When we the people self-regulate, self-censor, we are placing barriers on the greatest tool the individual has to fight power & money and maintain our liberty.

You may personally find Charlie Hebdo offensive. Or you may find that folks like me are infringing upon your liberty by mandating you publish things you find offensive.

But make no mistake, I’m not saying you must publish anything. You’re a free person too. Make your own decision. Republish or not, it’s your call.

You can say you find Charlie Hebdo offensive and refuse to republish the images. Or you can say you support freedom of speech. But you cannot do both. You have to make a choice. Sorry. You may find this inaccurate or unfair, but life’s a cruel nightmare. If you don’t stand up for freedom, even if at times it requires you to do things you find offensive, then be prepared to see your liberty progressively eroded by the forces of darkness (whoever they might be).

To alter wise words somebody else once said:

You might not be interested in offending men like this, but I assure you, they are interested in offending you.

hates freedom

This is not just about Charlie Hebdo or Mohammed or religion. This man represents a force that wants to take your freedom. There are many like him across all aspects of our Earth. We have to fight back, wherever and whoever they are.

It’s either all okay, or none of it is. Make your choice. I’ve made mine. I hope you’ll join me in choosing liberty first. Even if by doing so, you are guaranteed to offend somebody. Even if that somebody, is yourself.