Category Archives: News

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How not to stop corruption

For the degenerate blog author, vicious dictatorships are the gift that keeps on giving. It’s just so much fun to point out how utterly foolish their actions are. On the other hand, we also seem to spend a great deal of time bashing democratically elected politicians here too. So, I guess you could say we’re equal opportunity bigots.

We hate all the human race. We’re all ruined. Please make your plans accordingly. My guests support this theory. They have volunteered their services to bring about our Eventual Doom. Celebrations are to be planned. Fun to be had.

Anyways. So China’s overlords once again want the little people to know they care. The State’s on the path to slaying corruption.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-china-29797985

If you’re a poor peasant, and a party hack just ejected you off your family’s ancient farmland using thugs, so they could build an apartment block so ugly Soviet dudes would cringe, you’re designated recourse is to:

“After receiving a report from someone who provides his real name, the procuratorate should do a risk assessment and must, in a timely manner, implement a protection plan and prevent reprisals on the whistle-blower,” it said.

Ah, I see. So, like, if we blow the whistle on Xi Jinping’s ~$2B personal fortune, do my guests & I get the support of the State to “prevent reprisals on the whistle-blower”?

What about Ilham Tohti? Lots of people say he’s a well-deserving whistle-blower type. He’s said such interesting things like acknowledging Chinese rule over Xinjiang and promoting racial harmony with such delicious statements as: “do not place hatred between the two people, Uighur and Han”.

So you know this guy is accorded all the protections of China’s just laws, right?

Except he just got jailed for life. For life.

Just get a look at this guy. Now here’s a man who looks like he’s ready to start shooting Reds in the streets tomorrow. What a freak zealot. Man, the Reds really dodged a bullet by locking his dangerous ass up forever:

tohti

Oh, so, ah, I guess they’re not serious. Hmm, I wonder if this is just about Xi using the excuse of fighting corruption so he can crush all opposition to his benevolent, wise rule. But he wouldn’t do that. He seems like a real standup, honest guy. Just ask Ilham Tohti’s family. I’m sure they’d back him.

stormy

The Arcturus Project’s Weekly (Not Weekly) Stormy Cloud Award goes to His Eminence President Xi Jinping, Billionaire, Hypocrite, Dictator & Overlord of the Chinese People

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There’s no limit to this lunacy

Attention Hollywood freaks, okay, you can do whatever you want, but you can’t call it Ghostbusters. You have to call it something else. We don’t care what it is, but it’s not Ghostbusters.

Now granted, even without the newfangled female cast we’d still be upset. You can’t have Ghostbusters without Harold Ramis. So as far as we’re concerned Ghostbusters is over. Because Ramis is currently engaged in a duel of the fates with Jimmy Stewart in Valhalla over a half loaded revolver, a burning candle, and a pair of goblets.

So what do we want? Well, probably just for them to leave it alone. It’s over, enjoy the movies for what they were. But no, we can’t do that, because they need to make more money. And name and/or concept recognition trumps the ability of a depraved Hollywood culture to come up with the apparent miracle of a new, fresh idea.

This has gotten out of hand. What’s next? Casablanca 2? Only this time (since there are no legit villains anymore) they get to battle “Hitlar” in New York. Hitlar’s a rich oil tycoon who likes to dispose of used 55 gallon oil drums in elementary schools.

And everything’s got to be an action movie now. So Sam’s suddenly proficient with a machine-pistol. And Rick and Ilsa have to meet in a Manhattan gin bar, again. Just so stupid folks in the theater can scream, “Awh shit son, he just said it! He just said it!”

How about Godfather 4? Al Pacino’s still got some gas left in the tank? Although they’d have to explain away the whole orange scene. But they can do it, somehow. Just look at the illogical mess they conducted in order to remake Star Trek. And it got them $853M.

Don’t think they won’t do it, folks. It’s just crazy enough to work. Just ask Harold Ramis!

ramis

HR: [monotone delivery] I sure hope these new producers know real Ghostbusters. Because if they do this, I shall haunt them. At night. As a ghost.

TAP: Thanks Harold.

HR: You are welcome.

TAP: …

HR: I’d like my fee now.

TAP: Oh. … [slowly unrolls bills from wad of cash] 

HR: I don’t have all day.

TAP: [speeds up unrolling]