The most pathetic line of conversation ever

Bars and human stupidity go together better than matches and gasoline.  So expecting any kind of reasonable behavior in such an environment is a bit of a stretch.  But still, when I’m trying to enjoy myself watching the game, I’d prefer not to experience the urge to hit the guy seated next to me with a plastic bat until the goo comes out.

Idiots say all kinds of things to impress women and/or men in a bar.  They wield pathetic pickup lines, act like somebody they’re not, and generally do anything possible to gain favor.

But by far, in my mind, the most pathetic line is the one where a guy (it’s almost always a man) tries to build themselves up by spitting upon the rest of the human race.  In this case:

Pig:  “So when I was there, real quick, I figured it out and I fired both [of the experienced journeymen], I fired ’em both up front.”

Target:  “Yeah, yeah.”

Pig:  “I don’t put up with that, I needed to make the point.  And then when I got up to [corporate] later these other two guys, I fired them too.  You gotta [make your mark].”

This kind of behavior really pisses me off.  I don’t understand the proclivity to increase your personal awesomeness on the backs of somebody else’s misery.  Maybe these people he fired deserved it, I don’t know.  The ability to terminate employment is a necessary aspect of a successful modern functioning society.  But that’s not the point.

I’ve fired folks before.  It fucking sucks.  You’re destroying somebody’s life, even if they deserve it.  I cannot intellectually comprehend taking this awful memory, and using it to brag to somebody you barely know.  How disgusting must you be, that the best argument you’ve got to prove how great you are is that you caused somebody else a lot of pain.

I know, I know, it’s in our primal nature to hate our fellow man.  That way, because you hate them, you can raid their cave, kill them, take all their worldly cave possessions and then burn their cave to the ground.  Then you’re the stronger and have more cave possessions.  This then enables you to conquer more caves.  But still, we’re supposed to evolve right?  Eh, not this guy, he apparently wants to live in the year 4831 BC.

In a different country / culture, this idiot wouldn’t be a businessman, he’d be a member of the secret police.  The kind of guy who breaks down doors at 3am to drag the casual blogger to the torture dungeon while the dude’s wife and kids are screaming.

I generally try and be a positive (cynical) dude, but this type of human gets me angry.  I’m not quite sure who raised him, or twisted his mind, but his kind are of almost zero value to the planet.

So hopefully down the road he gets fired for shouting at his boss while acting like a drunk moron in a bar.  And then maybe, he’ll have the ah-ha moment, and grow the fuck up.


the cause of and solution to, all of life’s problems.

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